Whether you're reading this as an escape from the buzz of events or found it discarded on a chair somewhere (press F to pay respects), let me take this opportunity to give you a warm welcome to Southampton.

On a rickety low cart, drawn by a decrepit pony, was a large wooden packing-case on which some well-meaning hand had drawn, in black paint which still gleamed wetly in the sun, a rude cross.

The reason she got to him quicker than I did is because Mooring did not turn me aloose as quick as Cox turned her aloose.

Rollerblading is a piece of piss if you know how to roller-skate.