No one disputes Lloyd Webber's talent for promotion. He always opens in London and wins over British audiences before heading to the vastly more expensive Broadway stage. The result is a criticproof show.

In the leather industry skive has another connotation, concerning splitting the skin perpendicularly to its thickness into thin layers. Imagine now being able to skive at the nanoscale.

The embankments forming the lineside forest are also a cause for concern, as landslips can block the line for days or even weeks.

There's a strong case for replacing the present system of anonymous testing with mandatory reporting of new infections, and vigorous contact tracing of sexual and needle-sharing partners.