Ace could have done a fade. Instead, he gathered all his courage — which was not inconsiderable, even in his middle age — and went to see the Flying Corson Brothers.

I still had 5 miles (8 km) or so to go to cross the river when all of the controls went south. The bird pitched up, shuddered, rolled right like it was going to spin […]

The pregame crew then showed a pair of faux-Super Bowl ads, including an unnecessarily woke Cheez-It commercial and a Papa John’s ad that fully embraces Pizzagaters.

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