She told me about a time she and a photographer were sent out to do ‘another treechange story’ – a feel-good piece, she explained, about mainlanders moving to Tasmania.

Past all the doses of your drugging doctors

I do find Valentine's Day slightly irritating, however, in the sense that single people seem encouraged to be depressed and couples jubilant. It is possible to be in a shitty relationship and to be happily by yourself. OK, those for whom the former is applicable may get to do Valentinesy things, but they've got to stick the rest of the year together.

But he will be as cabinetable after the catastrophe as he was before.