Omphalopsychites: Mencken's word for those who dream of bringing American English into line with English English. Omphalos is Greek for navel, whence also omphaloskeptic, one who dreams up bright ideas while gazing at (skepsis, a looking at) his navel.

connaturalize your midnight revels to your temper

His mother o'er her barm-cloth wide / Gazed forward somewhat timidly / The new-comer's bright weed to see.

For more serious problems caused by the cellphone, we may need new laws — as in the case of upskirts.