He kept me out of the house while he was redecorating.

Rather than leading the world in glamour and style, the majority of continentals seem to have been left behind in an era when proto-mullets, moonwalk loafers and white socks were right up there with Pac Man and rollerblades.

The latest addition to our stock of fine watches—Thin Model, 12 size, 25-year gold-filled case, open face, Roman numeraled dial, full jeweled movement.

There were signs of recent roastings and fryings, and Frank explained he’d been eating pretty well, making his way through frozen stocks from the shop.