Actually I suspect that at the moment you are smoking crack and reaching for a jar of vaseline while you peruse the nudie GIFs. Just be sure to get a handi-wipe for your video screen. Remind me to wish you many happy returns on your 14th birthday.

It is not surprising that the landowner strove to screw his tenants.

On a certain day the King was seated on the story of his palace which overlooked the town and the outskirts beyond the walls, in conversation with his Minister and favourites, when the Durweish was espied at no great distance standing on the broadway; which, when the King knew, he desired messengers might be dispatched to convey the holy man to his presence.

Prior to the explosion we spoke about what would happen if he [Lance-Corporal James Simpson] died and came back in a box and what music he would want at his funeral.