“I don't mean all of your friends—only a small proportion—which, however, connects your circle with that deadly, idle, brainless bunch—the insolent chatterers at the opera, the gorged dowagers,[…]the chlorotic squatters on huge yachts, the speed-mad fugitives from the furies of ennui, the neurotic victims of mental cirrhosus,[…]!”

And allow a bit of a cocktail hour before the meal so that when your guests arrive, you have time to mingle before you step into the kitchen.

Defence spending, as promised last week, is headed for a $54bn boost. Now Mr [Donald] Trump has revealed the size of his planned infrastructure programme, and it's a whopping $1 trillion.

I'll play the first couple of bars by myself to lead you in.