This applicant has almost all desirable properties.

an irretrievable loss

This afternoon, Wind W.S.W. an Engliſh brig appeared in the offing; ſhe was chaſed by a xebec and ſeveral gallies, but fortunately got ſafe into New Mole: She brings the joyful and happy tidings of a fine fleet being within twenty-four hours ſail of the Garriſon.

This is an interesting trick, but I include it with some reluctance because it requires one very quick-handed juggler, and since quick-handedness and klutziness are not often associated, this might create a problem.