My ſcoles are not for unthriftes untaught, For frantick faitours half mad and half ſtraught; But my learning is of another degree To taunt theim like liddrons, lewde as thei bee.

Some French dude food commanded me to come with him and gave me this ridiculous coiffure and coloured me pink and gave me to a luscious looking cattess who has been very nice to me.[…]Only the cattess is gone and my feline littermate and I have been left to our own devices.[…]Another cattess, kinda pale but formerly tabby, popped out of a book and seems to be hooking up everyone in the castle, including my original cattess.

His plan to take over the business was blocked by the boss.

[…] But I will wear my heart upon my sleeve For daws to peck at: I am not what I am.