[…] from your large, fat, yellow, insipid onion, to your little, lean, fiery, bitter onionet […]

When earnestly they seek / Such proof, conclude they then begin to fail.

Like hell, I don't, he said. "I don't want to see my roommate get killed. You know how hard it was to find someone who wasn't a Craigslist creepazoid in the first place? […]

Lookee, thee bist purty, my love; lookee, thee bist purty: thee hast dove's eyes betwix thy locks; thy locks be like a flock o' ship fur thickedness.