To prevent the elixir from reaching mankind and thereby upsetting the balance of the universe, two gods secret it away.

The Western Region was far more in the doldrums, with two types of incompatible motive power: out-of-favour vacuum-braked diesel-hydraulics and incompatible diesel electrics - a changeover policy which also affected the ability to introduce brand new coaching stock.

It also offers a portal to something deeper: a current collective wish to fill our kitchens with hydrangeas, drape ourselves in Eileen Fisher, pour some wine over ice with our closest friends and stop sweating the small stuff.

If you hook your network cable into the jack, you'll be on the network.