Being too young to attend a show on Bowie's 1983 Serious Moonlight tour, I did what any underage doofus would do. I bought a concert T-shirt – three-quarter-length blue sleeves, image of Major Tom himself on the front.

I was even more excited to tailor it with a choice of dressings — blue cheese, ranch, French, Russian, Italian, creamy Italian.

When we come to occupative names, we are again confronted by crowds of diminutives.

A miniature[…]remarkable for its brilliancy of colour and charming freedom of handling.