It is Boxing Day in a football ground, and all we can do is sprawl over the plastic, hurling instructions and vague encouragement. The seat is an extension of the sofa, the match another Pick of the Day in the Radio Times. Some are wearing Santa hats, some have been drinking only six or seven hours after last stopping, guzzling away, topping up their levels to reach pie-eyed delirium.

You've decided to admit that 'high foreheadedness' and 'balding' are one and the same thing.

There is nothinge so close, that shall not be openned, and nothinge so hyd that shall not be knowen.

Too funny. I love the way these Mormon cultists refer to the devil, aka Satan, aka Lucifer as “the Adversary”! It’s Mormon-speak. It is the only proper way in Mormondumb. The invisible bogeyman. Christ! If they could only look from the outside at how stupid they look.